IBINTU BURI UMWE MU BASHAKANYE ABA YIFUZA KURI MUGENZI WE
IBINTU BURI UMWE MU BASHAKANYE ABA YIFUZA KURI MUGENZI WE
Ubuzima bw’abashakanye ni ishingiro ry’imiryango yose. Iyo urugo rufite urukundo, kubahana no kwizerana, usanga no mu buzima bw’imiryango yose byoroshye. Ariko iyo hagati y’abashakanye hadatekanye, bigira ingaruka ku bana, ku muryango mugari ndetse no ku iterambere ry’igihugu. Ni yo mpamvu buri umwe mu bashakanye aba afite ibyo yifuza kuri mugenzi we, n’ubwo rimwe na rimwe atabivuga mu magambo. Iyo ibyo byifuzo byubahirijwe, urugo ruba indashyikirwa; iyo byirengagijwe, ugasanga hari ibibazo n’amakimbirane.
Iyi nkuru iragaruka ku bintu by’ingenzi buri mugabo n’umugore baba bifuza kuri mugenzi wabo, ibigaragaza mu buryo bwimbitse, ndetse ikanatanga inzira zishobora gufasha kubishyira mu bikorwa.
- 1. Kwitabwaho
Kwita ku wo mwashakanye ni ikintu cya mbere cy’ingenzi buri wese aba yifuza. Kwitabwaho ntibisaba ibintu bihenze cyangwa bikomeye, ahubwo ni utuntu duto ariko dufite agaciro gakomeye.
Uramuhamagara ukamubaza uko yiriwe.
Umwakira neza igihe agarutse mu rugo.
Umuba hafi mu bihe bimugoye cyangwa by’umunezero.
Umwereka ko umutekereza, n’iyo ari mu rugendo cyangwa mu kazi.
Iyo ugaragaje ko witaye ku wo mwashakanye, umuha icyizere ko afite agaciro mu buzima bwawe. Ibi bikora nk’umuti w’imitima kandi bikongera ubusabane.
- Kudafata mugenzi wawe nk’igikoresho
Abashakanye bamwe bafata abo bashakanye nk’ibikoresho bibafasha mu buzima, aho kubafata nk’abantu bafite agaciro. Umugabo ashobora gufata umugore nk’uwamufasha mu rugo gusa; umugore na we agafata umugabo nk’aho ari umushahara gusa cyangwa itanki y’amafaranga.
Ariko mu by’ukuri, buri wese ashaka kubahwa nk’umuntu. Iyo mugenzi wawe yumva ko umufata nk’ufite agaciro, urukundo rurakomera. Iyo umufashe nk’igikoresho gusa, umutima we urahinduka, akarangwa n’uburakari cyangwa gucika intege.
- Kumwubaha no kumwubahisha
Umugabo cyangwa umugore wese aba yifuza kubahwa. Kubahwa bisobanuye kumufata neza, kumuvugaho amagambo meza, no kumwereka icyubahiro imbere y’abandi.
Ntukamusebye mu ruhame.
Ntukamucishe bugufi imbere y’inshuti, abaturanyi cyangwa abana.
Mubere icyitegererezo mu kumwubahisha, kuko bimwongerera ishema.
Iyo uhesheje agaciro uwo mwashakanye, uba nawe wiyubashye. Umugabo utesha umugore we agaciro cyangwa umugore utesha umugabo we agaciro, aba ari no kwitesha ubwe.
- Kumuha umwanya wo kwisanzura
N’ubwo abashakanye baba bagomba gusangira byinshi, buri wese akenera umwanya we bwite. Iyo umuntu abuze aho yisanzurira, yumva ababaye kandi atishimye.
Kumuha umwanya ntibisobanuye kumutererana cyangwa kumusiga wenyine igihe cyose. Bisobanuye kumuha uburenganzira bwo kugira ibihe byo kwitekerezaho, gusohoka n’inshuti cyangwa gukora ibyo akunda, nta kumucyurira cyangwa kumugenzura bikabije.
Iyo umuha uwo mwanya, bituma akugarukira akunezerewe kurushaho.
- 5. Kugirana ibiganiro byubaka
Umwe mu mizi y’amakimbirane mu ngo ni ukutaganira neza. Hari ingo aho abantu baganira ari uko hari ikibazo, kandi bakakivugana batongana. Ariko mu buzima busanzwe, buri wese aba yifuza kugira uwo baganira nawe ku buryo bworoshye kandi bwubaka.
Gahunda za buri munsi zigomba kujya ziganirwaho.
Intego z’urugo zikaganirwaho.
Imbogamizi muhura nazo zikaganirwaho mu bwitonzi.
Iyo ibiganiro bihora bihari, ntihaba umwanya w’amagambo y’amahane cyangwa amarangamutima akabije.
- Kumushimira
Buri wese akenera gushimirwa. Umugabo cyangwa umugore akora byinshi mu rugo ibyoroheje n’ibikomeye. Iyo umushimiye, uba umwongereye imbaraga zo gukomeza gukora neza.
Shima umugore igihe ateguye amafunguro meza.
Shima umugabo igihe akuyoboye mu gukemura bibazo cyangwa akagufasha mu bikorwa by’urugo.
Koresha amagambo yoroshye nka “urakoze”, “uranyishimiye” cyangwa “warakoze cyane”.
Ushobora no kumushimira mu bindi bikorwa, nk’impano, ubutumwa bugufi, cyangwa akantu gashimisha. Ibyo byose bikomeza ubusabane.
- Kwirinda kumutaranga
Hari abashakanye bamenyereye gutaranga bagenzi babo mu nshuti, mu miryango, cyangwa mu baturanyi. Umugabo cyangwa umugore akavuga ibitagenda neza byose bya mugenzi we mu ruhame.
Ibi ntacyo byubaka, ahubwo birasenya. Uwo uvuga nabi arushaho gucika intege, kandi nawe uba urimo witesha agaciro.
Niba hari ikibazo, jya ugikemurira mu rugo no hagati yanyu mwembi, aho kugihishura hanze. Kwihangana no kuganira mu bwiyoroshye nibyo bizana umuti, si ugutarangana.
- Kumuha agaciro mu bikorwa byose
Uwo mwashakanye aba yifuza ko yumva ko afite agaciro mu buzima bwawe. Agaciro si amagambo gusa, ahubwo ni ibikorwa:
Kumufasha mu biganiro by’ingirakamaro.
Kumusaba inama ku byemezo bikomeye.
Kumuha ijambo mu bijyanye n’imari, abana cyangwa gahunda z’urugo.
Iyo wubahirije mugenzi wawe muri ibyo byose, yumva afite agaciro kandi ubuzima burushaho kugenda neza.
- Urukundo rw’ukuri
Mu by’ukuri, icyifuzo cya buri wese mu bashakanye ni urukundo nyakuri. Urukundo rutari amagambo gusa, ahubwo rukagaragarira mu bikorwa.
Urukundo ni:
Kumuba hafi mu bihe bigoye no mu byishimo.
Kumubabarira igihe yakoze ikosa.
Kumwereka ko utamureka n’ubwo hari ibyo adatunganya neza.
Urukundo ni urufunguzo rutuma byose bigenda neza. Iyo urukundo rwabuze, byose bihinduka ubusa.
- Gusangira inshingano
Hari igihe usanga umwe mu bashakanye arekera undi inshingano zose. Ibi birarushya kandi bikurura amakimbirane.
Uburyo bwiza ni gufatanya:
Mu gufata ibyemezo by’urugo.
Mu kurera abana.
Mu gucunga umutungo.
Mu kwita ku rugo.
Iyo buri wese afashe inshingano ze, urugo ruba indashyikirwa.
- Kumenya gusabana
Abashakanye ntibagomba kuba abashakanye gusa, ahubwo bagomba no kuba inshuti. Kugirana ibihe by’umunezero, gusohokana, gusangira ibyo mukunda, byose ni ingenzi.
Iyo mwabaye inshuti kurusha kuba abashakanye gusa, urugo rwanyu ruba rurambye.
Ibyo buri wese mu bashakanye yifuza kuri mugenzi we si ibintu bihanitse, ahubwo ni ibikorwa byoroshye ariko bifite agaciro gakomeye: kwitabwaho, kubahwa, gushimirwa, guhabwa umwanya, kumusangiza ibiganiro no kumufata nk’umuntu w’agaciro.
Iyo ibyo byose byubahirijwe, urugo rwuzura amahoro n’urukundo. Niba rero hari icyo wifuza ku mugabo cyangwa umugore wawe, tangira kukimukorera nawe, kuko urukundo ni nko kureba mu ndorerwamo: ibyo ukoreye mugenzi wawe, ni byo azakugarurira.
